April 25, 2005

...back when I was younger....about a week ago...

Some days I stroll into work just happy that the world hasn't ended yet... but the next 3.5 years will surely be scary won't they, kids?

Headline: Bush cancels Earth Day visit
Verdict: Bush told environmentalist that he was really really looking forward to attending this event, but couldn't go because he had left something burning on the stove.

Headline: Utility workers electrocuted
Verdict: Here's something I was taught when I was 8...remember kids, don't monkey around power lines! Apparently the death of the two victims knocked out power in the Bandera,TX area for about 15 minutes.... 15 MINUTES!!!!

Headline: Navajo Nation Slated To Vote On Same-Sex Marriage Ban
Verdict: When a minority group that has gone through tough times and prejudice themselves start showing no love to homosexuality and loving same-sex marriages, it brings to light that being gay is apparently on a whole other level of hatred and bigotry than anything else in America.

Headline: Pope 'prayed not to be elected'
Verdict: Either (A) There is no god, (B) God doesn't even grant prayer requests from mighty cardinals, or (C) Prayer is a complete waste of time and no one is listening.

Headline: Church youth group leader accused of abuse
Verdict: I'm thankful that somehow I've managed to go through several years of Catechism with an unsullied ass! This guy was just a youth group leader... I guess even the minions are getting in on the action now.

Headline: Police: 'Can you hear me now?' robbers sought
Verdict: Verizon's been robbing their customers for years with high overage charges and roaming while inside the coverage area!!! It's about damn time someone took notice.

Headline: Truck Spills Cheese On I-465 in Indiana, Causes Backup
Verdict: And in Wisconsin, they weep as flags are at half-mast.

And Finally...

Headline: Bush seeks Saudi help on oil prices
Verdict: There's a glory hole joke in there somewhere... hehe J/K.

Posted by Reese at April 25, 2005 9:36 AM