What is becoming quickly known as the Fourth Crusade, Catholic and Orthodox Christians have uncovered a new weapon of mass destruction in what is sure to evolve as a worldwide holy war against fundamental Islam. Pope Benedict cheered with enthusiasm, "We have attained the most powerful weapon… more powerful than the Death Star... just visit ChuckNorrisFacts.com and you'll know why we're so joyful!" Hamas leader Khaled Meshaal rebutted by soiling himself to death.
God has Chuck Norris on his speed dial for when something has to be done in under seven days.
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